What was the last straw on this Donkey?

I had been wanting to write something to keep up with the way my brain works (assuming I have one and that it works). For most of the times, I end up forgetting everything. I guess I can even forget my name if I am not called by my name for a week.

The other day, I left my coolers somewhere in the house. But where? I have searched the whole house, infact brought the whole house down – they are yet to go back up – but no sign of my glasses. My husband these days is tired of my forgetfulness. He is close to a control freak and with me around, the poor man has a tough time. He can never be sure that Vidya has done something and lay his mind at rest. I sometimes say, if my head is not attached to my body, and you need to attach it on a daily basis, I am capable of forgetting that activity and still function around wondering why I am not doing a good job at something that I generally am used to.

So its checking if the door is locked twice before leaving out the house if we leave together, and twice again before going to bed and checking the stove if its off when he crosses the kitchen, for I was close to set the house on fire (that would be a post by itself) once. These are just some examples. One such thing was to blog. I had been wanting to do it for more than 5 years now. Procrastination, that’s another thing that I am famous for (I can write more than one post on that). I have so much of stuff to do, that my to-do list has close to 20 plus things on it and some of them have been there for more than 6 months. But nothing can beat this one. This has been there for more than 5 years. :-)

Sometime back, a common friend of ours had been reading Dubukku’s blogspot and sent me this link. http://dubukku.blogspot.com/2005/10/blog-post_04.html and asked me read on Aravindswami saying that she was laughing reading that. That was the last straw on this donkey’s back. He inspired me like anything. I was reading through his blogs the whole day.

The very next day, happened to be my parents 37 anniversary and the first one without my mom. I was in a funny way too upset about it and my husband the great communicator that he is was upset about something else – would not open his mouth about that.. and both of us were trying to pick up on some silly stuff at each other. That made me burst out to (had to somewhere... right?) create the site and blog my first entry on the 14th of September as a tribute to my Mom.

Thanks to Dubukku, Dheekshanya, Ambi, Vidya – my namesake, Anjana Menon, Shoba, Rajeev, Driftglass, Kanjisheik, and all the others who were inspirational in making me start this.

A full list should be available some time soon – planning to tag those pages in mine. :-)

Mystic India—The Giant Movie—My 2 Cents

Was indeed a giant movie made of a small country. My country. Had read so many reviews and wanted to see what it was that this small boy did.

The blurbs that I read said, that it was a walk of 7 years of a 11 year old boy – a young yogi. I was expecting to see another westernized way of looking into India. But this was different. A typical Indian way of approaching the subject and the trail of this young yogi. Made me marvel at the faith and will this young boy had at that tender a age. When at this age, not that I am a granny.. but still question His existence at many a time.

The way Neelkant, that’s the boy’s name, walks all alone in the summits of Himalayas, all alone with nothing to accompany him except his faith makes you believe in god. The enormity of the mountains in sharp contrast to this small boy all by himself, with nothing with him, no food, no clothes to keep him warm except for this faith. He is going all around the country to understand the supreme better and in the process learns to become one with nature. The way the camera goes with the boy makes you feel that you have made your journey around India.

Leaves with a feeling you have gone to India for 45 mins. Right from the time, you are welcomed with an elephant to the time when Neelkant decides to stay in a place in Gujarat, the movie makes you leave with a feeling that you have been in India for a few days and have returned back to US when you get out to go to the parking lot.

Kudos to the crew and to everyone associated with the making. An excellent movie that brings out the unity of India in its diversity. One more reason to feel proud to be an Indian. I am so happy to be a drop in that vast ocean.

A space for me to do exactly what I want :-)

But do you know exactly what you want to do?

Now you cannot be asking me that. You should also be assuming that I know what I want to do and just let me be. Hmm.. I can go on and on and on with no one to question me. Wow that sounds really cool. What are the possibilities?

1. I can ramble about the books that I have read. All the different junk I end up reading. (Sometimes I end up reading some good junk too for a change and at other times its nothing).
2. I can take a trip down memory lane and generally come up with some nostalgia.
3. I can write reviews (note the arrogance there) on the movies I watch.
4. Polambalam, (go ranting and raving) when I don’t like something.
5. Take some notes for myself.
6. Do a lot of elaborate observations (ah, now I have come to the point that what my blog could precisely be.. Or did I really?) on the day to day happenings in my life.
7. And so on and so forth. [I cannot think of any right now, if I get will add later, that way, that would help me remember what all I would want to do (lol)]

I had wanted to do this for a very very long time. Initially wanted to have a page for myself, and even got a domain that my dear husband had got for me. But just didn’t get the drive to do it. Then one day, in-between work, something struck and I thought, this would be a easier way to do it and boom I created one and started blogging just like that. Exactly the way I do everything in life.

Manasil Mithuna Mazhai Pozhiyum Azhagil oru Mayilin Alasalaasyam... (VHS)

I saw this Malayalam movie called Nandhanam. If I am right, it was the first movie of Navya Nair. And for a first movie that girl is just too good. And the cast includes Prithviraj, Revathy, Kaaviyoor Ponnama as P’s Gramms, Innocent, Jagathi and many others whom I don’t know.

Okay, I need tell this before I proceed further. I am not that fluent in Malayalam with Tamil being my mother tongue and if I end up speaking Malayalam a native of the language is going to have a tough time. But then, I can surely survive with my knowledge in any remote village of Kerala. But I sure enjoy a good Malayalam movie more than a regular Tamil movie. So much for a language.

Let me get back to Nandhanam. Its an awesome movie. I don’t know if everyone would feel that way. Its just another romance where a poor servant girl falls in love with the master of the house and the usual problems that go with it where the relatives are against it and make them feel miserable. But the beauty of this movie is the girl by herself. She is a very simple girl, with simple expectations in life and is not angry at the people who are trying to spoil it for her, is so genuine in the way she gets things around the house for the old woman (KP) and in general it’s the girl who makes you get involved in the movie. And of course the script. Being an ardent devotee of Guruvayoorappan, she is for ever taking to him as her friend. Comes to his picture when she is happy to share a few words and again to cry to him when she is upset about something. And those conversations just stay with you long after the movie is over and is just classic. So much so, the lord himself is not able to just not be without hearing her and comes down for her as her next door Unni Ettan and gets her married to her sweetheart.

The movie lingers in your mind long after you have seen it. Makes you feel that God is right there hearing you all the time and there for you no matter what and if there is a time which you find difficult to cross he is going to come next to you in some form. Its just that you do not know. I can just go on and on and on… Dunno why some movies have this feeling of making so silent about it after watching it and you just feel like you have had a look into something so so special. Like it was a message just for you!

And there is a song where she is confused as who this next door guy is … Manasil Mithuna Mazhai … my favorite from the time I have seen the movie and a couple more where she sings on lord Krishna ... Karmugil Varnande Chundil ... Excellent Excellent Excellent. I had to iterate it that many times. Couldn’t help it. I have been listening to that song the last few days repetitively and just had to write about it. How I wish I can understand those songs better!

My Dad going hi-tech!

Appa is a unique personality that cannot be defined that easily. He is the kind of dad, who is always out to please his son and daughter no matter how much he has to work for it. I once remember Amitabh Bachan being asked a question in an interview about how his relationship with Abishek is as both of them act together and there is this generation gap of a father and a son between them. Amitabh replied saying that he is a very obedient dad. Wonder how he stole that answer from my dad or is it a school of dads who just do that. Be obedient to their children.

He is always there, no matter what, it would appear he is obedient, but lemme tell you, he would make you dance to his whims and fancies and you wouldn’t even know that you are dancing to his tunes. He would reason it out so well that you would adopt it to be your tune and if he realizes the music is good on the other side, I tell you, you would get a genuine appreciation and he would adopt it himself. That’s something that I enjoyed in him and its one the many things that he has that makes me feel proud to be his daughter.

One such thing was using cell phones and he deciding to get hi-tech to stay in touch on communication with his kids. Oh god, how many times has he pressed the ‘end call’ button to ‘pick’ up a call. And after talking to ‘end’ a call, he would just end up pressing the ‘end call’ button a little too much and switch off the phone. Then would sit waiting for his son to call and wonder why this son of his hasn’t called.

After a wait of about an hour and 2 or 3 vethali pakku with pogayalai done, he would decide to call his son to find out why he hasn’t called and would pick up the land line and call him up.

My Bro: En appa, ivalo neram phone panna. Enna pannina nee, un cell phone work pannalaya?
Appa: Ennamo therila da. Pakkathulaye dhan vechundu irukken. Nee dhan pannalai. Panni irundha adichirukkume.
My Bro: Enakkennamo nee adhai switch off pannitiyonnu doubt. Eduthu paaru, if there is light on the screen?

He takes the mobile and tries to look at it with a keen copyrighted look of his to find out that he has switched his cell off. (If anyone has seen him they would know the way he looks or tries to read something without his glasses and with the vethalai in his mouth—that’s a beautiful sight to see).

Appa: Amaam da, light kaanom. Switch off pannitten pol irukku. Naan onnum pannalaye.
My Bro: Enkitta pesittu, enna pannina?
Appa: un kitta pesittu, phone off panninen. (that is he did a ‘end call’).
My Bro: Hmm… Naan nenekkaren.. nee andha button-a romba azhuthitta. Adhan phone off aayiduthu.
Appa: Ok! That was the reason, it didn’t ring all this while. Look here … enakkellam idhu othu varadhu. Appavala mudiyadhu. Enakku indha land line pdhum. Ennai ellam nee hi-tech aaka pakkadhey.

And if think my brother would accept that for an answer, then you got it wrong. (Of course, you do not know him the way I do, right?)

My Bro: Idha paar, naan innimey unakku phone pannina, cell phone-nukku dhan pannuven, so adhai un pakkathula vechukko. Unakku dhan, pakka theriyardhu illai, if it is switched off, u know to switch it on. So use the cell phone.

So that’s how the phone call ended this day.

Not knowing any of this, I call up my brother after a week long gap. It has been a couple of days since I spoke to my dad too.

Vidya: Deai, enna da pannarey? Busy-a?
My Bro: Illai dee..Sollu!
Vidya: Ennatha solla. Enna pannarey? Appa kitta pesiniya?
My Bro: kekkadhey, I did a mistake of getting him a wrong cell phone. Adhu konjam over-a end call button amukkina phone off aayidradhu. So appa appo appo cell phone off pannidra.
Vidya: Landline-kku panna vendiyadhu dhaney.
My Bro: Naan matten. I want him to learn to use the Cell phone.

(I realize, ivan edho solli irukkan appava. Andha kovathula dhan, enkitta indha mari cryptic-a pesaran. If not, he would be highly enthusiastic to receive a call from me any day.)

Okay, I now decide to make a call to appa.

Vidya: Hey Appa emi pannarey?
Appa: Onnum illai dee, ippo dhan paattiya pothi vittutu, indha book eduthu vechunden padikkalamnu.
Vidya: Naan keduthuttena?
Appa: Illai dee kanna. Sollu. Enna pananrey? Konthai eppadi irukke?
Vidya: Super-a irukken. And so is un mappalai. Nee sollu. Un pillai pesinana?
Appa: Panninan dee, but, naan ennamo panni vechutten andha cell-phone adikkalai. Paavam aasai-ya phone panni irukkan, neraya try panni irukka and had got upset that I did not pick it up. Oru vazhiya edutha podhu, kathittu, vechuttan. Enakku edhukku indha cell phoneum mannagattiyum.
Vidya: Hmm.. free-a vidu. Avan dhan loosunnu theriyumey. Thana land line phone pannuvan. Kandukkadhey.
Appa: avanukku irukku. Naan kathukkaren iru. Avanukku SMS anupparen iru.
Vidya: Yebba! Paravaillaiye.. konjam pola unakkum rosham vandhuduthey. Seri, inga vera onnum vishesham illai. Naan nalikki phone pannaren.

Ippadi irundha my dad, these days is sending us SMS messages, wishing us Good Morning and Good Night and sending us small notes as updates! And is using the cell phone to a very great extent. And is still walking right along side us the way he used to make us walk beside him when he was teaching us when I was 15 and my brother 11 right along side him. Its a bit silly, but we still have to share anything and everything with our dad. I am a little better and can accept that he can grow old. But my brother can never ever accept that his dad can grow old. He has to have dad for everything and this man enjoys it equally.

And at 70 he really has gotten hi-tech to prove he can do it! Keep it up PA!

September 14 1969—It is 37 years today!

Never once even remotely did I think, that I would undergo the kind of emotions I undergo these days for a person who when living never made me to even be aware of what I should have been. It has been almost a year. Of course I know that today is the 14th of September in 2006 and for this day to come from the 14th of September in 2005 the earth has to do a full circle which means a full whole year. But this heart of mine is not ready to accept that and thinks of this day last year as if it all just happened yesterday.

The phone call I made that day is still so fresh in my memory. The way she was so excited over a small gift that her husband, my dad, had given her. She sounded like a kid getting something the first time. It was such a small thing, for I did get to see it when I went home in November. But mind you, how much ever small it may be, it was a gift of gold. And this man really knew how to get into her heart. Oh how I wish I could turn back time. So many things have become so simple these days compared to what it used to be. Why is it taking so long for people to find how to go back in time?

There is still so much ask you, tell you, let you know how I feel about you and also learn how you really feel about me. Funny, I did not ever think that marriage could make you understand your mother so well. Is this some kind of a cheap trick that God wants to play on me for the tough times that I gave you? I never meant to be bad. I still sometimes cannot think of another way to react to certain situations that I reacted.

Makes me think yet again, if only I could turn back time I might try to do it different this time (I still am not sure if I would do it right – the right that you would define as right). But would sure try to get the message through you that with all the defects a person can have, I and we all love you amma and you would be missed acutely.

Hey, Mangamma Sabadam! Happy Anniversary Dee! So indha varusham enna thantha appa unakku?